Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Duendes said:
rockin’ panties
is it me or was she mixing booze with coke at the end?
That’s what I thought, too, lol.
Also, I like both, but gungame is yay. I agree that it should be given more time. And also, wtf, people are still playing CZ?
MasterP said:
Kip said:
Kip said:
Kip said:
Kip said:
Quote:
People need to become more accepting of one another, especially in somewhere like New York.Ideas like this make us no different than the “ridiculous Arab terrorists” that want us out of their country.
Hmm, I always felt like we were fairly open-minded in this area. I mean it’s not like there is an absence of hate crimes here, but I would think that the majority of us are tolerant of each other.
I’m planning on moving out of the tri-state area sometime in the summer and one of the things that I told my boyfriend I was going to miss was the diversity.
What I meant was that most people are so open-minded around here that the people who are not really need to catch on, especially since it is so diverse around here. =)
I just noticed something weird. It says in the quote that you quoted toranky, but I’m torankusu, lol. I’ve never changed my name on here before. Did you add that in yourself? xP If not, that’s strange.
Still wondering about this.
You can change the name of the person you’re quoting. See the posts I just quoted for an example.
Yeah, I know you can, but I was wondering if he changed it or not (“Did you add that in yourself?”). And if so, por que? My name was already in there.
torankusu said:
rcon_l@nce said:
toranky said:
Quote:
People need to become more accepting of one another, especially in somewhere like New York.Ideas like this make us no different than the “ridiculous Arab terrorists” that want us out of their country.
Hmm, I always felt like we were fairly open-minded in this area. I mean it’s not like there is an absence of hate crimes here, but I would think that the majority of us are tolerant of each other.
I’m planning on moving out of the tri-state area sometime in the summer and one of the things that I told my boyfriend I was going to miss was the diversity.
What I meant was that most people are so open-minded around here that the people who are not really need to catch on, especially since it is so diverse around here. =)
I just noticed something weird. It says in the quote that you quoted toranky, but I’m torankusu, lol. I’ve never changed my name on here before. Did you add that in yourself? xP If not, that’s strange.
Still wondering about this.
MasterP said:
I really don’t want to get invovlved in this thread but the best way to deal with depression is to find a doctor you can trust, a psychiatrist you can connect with, a real boyfriend/girlfrind that you can connect with on a spiritual level and isn’t just a *edited*buddy or drinking partner, avoid drugs/alcohol like the plague, get some meds if you need them, and let your life play out as it will. Try to maintain a healthy mental, emotional, and spiritual balance and whatever you do try to never think about the depression itself. Don’t use it as an excuse for failing to achieve a goal or a reason your life is the way it is. The larger part you let it play in your life, the larger part it actually becomes in your life.
Most important of all, vote Republican in November. This step is crucial to your success.
I agree with all, but two points. The end (because I’m actually fairly apathetic about politics at the present, keke) and the part where you say don’t use it as a reason for your life being the way it is. I agree that you shouldn’t use it as something to justify your failures. It WOULD explain it, but it doesn’t give you an excuse to continue down that path. For me, it’s a cycle that I’m trying to break. When I first started seeing one of my doctors, I told her that I didn’t want to be labeled or want to be seen as hiding behind a disorder (by people who think the way you described, using it as an excuse, blah blah blah; pretty sure my dad is one of those people so I haven’t told him I’m getting treatment), so I kept thinking they were flaws in my personality that I could correct myself. My psychologist also says this is part of the whole Asian thing discussed earlier. But anyway, I’d start out good, but slip. After trying for so long, it hasn’t worked for me, so I had to get help.
NuRayZ said:
torankusu said:
NuRayZ said:
also if saying “there are people with a lot more problems in the world than you” *edited*es you off, then you are missing the point. I didn’t say it to make him feel better, but just as a reminder. We tend to be a little egocentric when we are depressed, breaking that helps sometimes. or taking a trip to view the world from space. *edited* that would be awesome lol.
As a reminder of what? That his problems are not as significant?
I wouldn’t say that we’re egocentric because they’re OUR problems. How can you be seen as self-centered when they’re YOUR issues to deal with? If you were saying that everyone was out to get you, like they were going out of their way to ruin your life, I’d say you were egocentric. You think everything is about you.
And if that’s not what you meant, then you’re looking for different word than “egocentric.”
self centered in a way. Egocentric is stretching it i guess but..
as a reminder that his problems are not significant. Actually that’s exactly what i meant. Problems don’t define a person. Everyone has them. You can ponder all day about how you became depressed, and if/when you find out what the root of the problem is, how does that help? It doesn’t really. The part that helps is the moment you decide you want to get better. To do away with the problems and to start anew. We’re all just dust in the wind man, rather than be that depressed piece of *edited*, snap out of it and stop feeling sorry for yourself. It’s easier said than done of course. Much harder for some than others. But we are ALL capable of changing our lives for the better. Like you said, maybe that next day will bring about something good. Again, I’m no doctor, I’m merely saying what I believe, and what worked for me.
People’s problems are significant. Maybe not to you, but it matters to them. I don’t tell people this kind of stuff because like I said earlier, you’re belittling their feelings. I see what you’re saying, I think. It sounds like you’re trying to inspire people to have the “I can overcome it, this is nothing” mindset, but not everyone can drop their problems and start fresh. If you can, it sounds like your issue is something that’s relatively short-term like, “boohoo, my gf dumped me.”
rcon_l@nce said:
toranky said:
Quote:
People need to become more accepting of one another, especially in somewhere like New York.Ideas like this make us no different than the “ridiculous Arab terrorists” that want us out of their country.
Hmm, I always felt like we were fairly open-minded in this area. I mean it’s not like there is an absence of hate crimes here, but I would think that the majority of us are tolerant of each other.
I’m planning on moving out of the tri-state area sometime in the summer and one of the things that I told my boyfriend I was going to miss was the diversity.
What I meant was that most people are so open-minded around here that the people who are not really need to catch on, especially since it is so diverse around here. =)
I kinda thought that’s what you meant, but I wasn’t sure because you said they need to be more accepting, not that they are. ^^
Another thing I’m going to miss about here: the pizza.
Edit: I just noticed something weird. It says in the quote that you quoted toranky, but I’m torankusu, lol. I’ve never changed my name on here before. Did you add that in yourself? xP If not, that’s strange.
MajorMajorMajor said:
I want to make the argument that Iron-fisted fathers tend to be a global phenomena rather than just with Asians, cept I don’t feel like rehashing stories of my childhood. I feel like I can tell a story of insane frugal behavior to disciplines involving the “peter-beater” that would display your guy’s fathers as well. (yes i called toranky a guy)
I may just be drawing some parallels between each experience while oblivious to the nuances but I guess I see things as universal rather than separate by a social construct.
LOL, I don’t care. I actually let people think I’m a guy till they figure it out.
Also, while tough dads are not exclusive to Asians, I feel like they’re more prevalent in Asian cultures. More of my [non-Asian] peers were able to get away with stuff with their parents and maybe a few of them might have a tough dad, but it feels like the opposite with Asians where you had a strict dad (or both parents; we’re leaving out the moms) and a few of them had a more lenient one. Might be just me.
My dad is actually quite laidback; he’s just verbally abusive. There’s a whole lot of other stuff, too, but I don’t think it’s characteristic of the hardass Asian dad. He’s just a douche.
Duendes said:
I was just trying to relate to torank so she won’t feel like she’s the only asian american experiencing the issue. Yes, there are fathers out in other societies that do the same thing but the reason why they do it and their societies opinion on it tends to be different. I was explaining it in a social psych sort of way.
I have a response that I was working on, but had to do something, so I put it aside. I’ll submit it later. xP I’m going to nap now. I have a headache. :[
NuRayZ said:
also if saying “there are people with a lot more problems in the world than you” *edited*es you off, then you are missing the point. I didn’t say it to make him feel better, but just as a reminder. We tend to be a little egocentric when we are depressed, breaking that helps sometimes. or taking a trip to view the world from space. *edited* that would be awesome lol.
As a reminder of what? That his problems are not as significant?
I wouldn’t say that we’re egocentric because they’re OUR problems. How can you be seen as self-centered when they’re YOUR issues to deal with? If you were saying that everyone was out to get you, like they were going out of their way to ruin your life, I’d say you were egocentric. You think everything is about you.
And if that’s not what you meant, then you’re looking for different word than “egocentric.”
So I played a few games, but every time I’m done, I get this error:
Also, I get a 404 when I click to return to the index (it worked only once iirc).
lockEm said:
MajorMajorMajor said:
Freezer said:
you will probably flame me for saying this but I don’t have a big problem with it. it wasn’t the entire Muslim faith that attacked us, it was the minority.
agreed
x2
x3
rcon_l@nce said:
People really need to stop being so ignorant.
I live across the Hudson and I have no problem with this.
Ditto.
Quote:
People need to become more accepting of one another, especially in somewhere like New York.Ideas like this make us no different than the “ridiculous Arab terrorists” that want us out of their country.
Hmm, I always felt like we were fairly open-minded in this area. I mean it’s not like there is an absence of hate crimes here, but I would think that the majority of us are tolerant of each other.
I’m planning on moving out of the tri-state area sometime in the summer and one of the things that I told my boyfriend I was going to miss was the diversity.
I meant to post this last night after you created the thread, but I saved my response:
It’s funny that write you about this because I’ve been depressed since the 5th grade (and for those of you don’t know, I’m 26) and it’s gotten much worse in the last few weeks. My current therapist theorizes that Asians don’t really consider or don’t believe in depression or mental disorders. My father is verbally abusive, so this really *edited*ed me over as I was growing up because 1) he didn’t stop because he thought I was just being lazy in school and that I don’t care and 2) my parents rarely sought help. I saw a counselor at school once in the 10th grade and then I started going to a psychologist in 11th grade and that lasted only a few months because I didn’t like her and how things were going. Since my dad thought I was just being lazy, he would call me names and insult me all the time and this just made me feel worse and my grades continued to be poor.
I’ve gone to counseling in college for two semesters, but it was usually late in the semester, so I didn’t get help for long. I just started again two weeks ago. I’m currently being evaluated for ADHD (I’m not hyperactive, but I am inattentive) and while the psychiatrist does see some elements of ADHD, the characteristics of depression and ADHD can coincide, so I have to do some stuff to help determine what’s what.
Anyway, ever since I was young, I’ve often thought about how I wish I wasn’t alive. I don’t think of killing myself and I have never hurt myself before because I find it scary and I don’t have a desire to die. But sometimes I kept thinking that if I died or something happened to me, my dad would realize how badly he treats me and maybe he’ll treat my siblings better. Lately, the thought of me no longer being here has been popping up in my head more frequently and I’ve been under a lot more stress than ever. Yesterday, I was supposed to have spent the day cramming for an exam that I was supposed to take today, but instead, I was sitting in the empty study lounge and crying. I ended up emailing my professor and explaining my situation about counseling and requested to withdraw from the course, which he is allowing me to do. [Note that “yesterday” was really Sunday and “today” is Monday. Like I said, I typed this up, but never submitted it.]
I deal with it by talking to my boyfriend and my Drs about it. I’ve also kept a journal since I was in the 5th grade (I think my mom kinda knew and she introduced me to the idea of keeping a journal), so I write down my thoughts there and less personal stuff on a blog. I used to keep it all bottled up, but in recent years, I’ve started to talk more to a few select people about it. As for your question about how long it lasts, it varies. For me, I’ve been this way since I was 10; we were going through some problems when I was young. I’m seeking help, though, so I’m hoping it will end soon.
I feel better today than I did yesterday (but still pretty down). Maybe I just needed to release some stress. I think I know how you feel. I oftentimes feel helpless, hopeless, and I have no motivation for doing things. However, my boyfriend, who has also been my best friend for years before we started dating, gives me support, and makes me feel like life is worth living. We are extremely alike and it’s taken us 8 years to confess how we felt for each other; we plan on getting married and I look forward to a life with him. Being depressed still makes it difficult to bring myself to do things because I lack focus and motivation (and there’s other stuff involved, like anxiety, but I won’t get into it), but that’s why I’m back in counseling.
You’ll find that something or someone that makes you feel the same way. You just have to be around for it.
That’s the end of what I’d written on Monday. Here is what I’m adding based on other people’s comments.
First, it’s not forever. You can get better, but don’t expect it to happen right away.
Second, don’t rule out the psychiatrists (or psychologists) as a resource when you’re feeling like this. I’ve seen five so far and while I didn’t like them all (but they weren’t bad), some of them are really helpful. The two that I’m currently seeing (one psychologist, the other a psychiatrist) are both Indian and as fellow Asians, they understand the *edited* that I’m being put through, which I think is awesome. I don’t have many Asian friends, so I don’t know many people who can relate. I can talk to my siblings, but we’ve all had different experiences growing up. I was telling my younger sister about my relationship with my dad a couple days ago. In the past, she has taken my dad’s stance on my behavior and it hurts because she couldn’t see what it’s like for me. Her childhood was different than mine and I think she’s my dad’s favorite kid, too, so she’s always gotten better treatment. Anyway, even if you don’t find someone who can relate to you personally, having a third party who’s not emotionally involved makes for a good listener. When I try to talk my problems out with a family member, rather than listening, they start telling me about events that happened, but from their perspective, or offer reasons for why things happened the way they did. Anyway, it really helps having someone who can relate to me culturally, but also not a friend or family member.
And lastly until I can think of something else, yeah, other people might be in worse situations than you, but that doesn’t mean that your depression isn’t valid. I can see why people say it, to try to cheer you up, but I hate that argument because it belittles YOUR feelings. I’ve dealt with a *edited* ton of verbal abuse ever since I was a little kid and not really much physical abuse, which I guess I’m lucky for, but my dad’s “parenting” has been a total mind*edited* and I’m stuck dealing with depression and anxiety. There’s lots of other *edited*, too, like I said before, but that’s the main stuff. Yeah, I’m fortunate that he’s not the kinda guy who beats his kids like some parents do or worse — or good thing I’m not poor or starving or whatever else people tell me I should thankful for — but it doesn’t make me feel any better. It sucks for the people who have *edited*tier problems than I do, but I still have problems and they are still there when I wake up the in the morning (or even while I’m dreaming, which is really annoying).
tl;dr – Your feelings are valid, you can overcome it, don’t let a bad experience with one doctor turn you away from counseling (srsly, wtf is wrong with that *edited*), and what if you kill yourself, but the next day was the day that things were gonna get better? You never know when it’s gonna happen, so hang around and find out.
Duendes said:
I’m pretty sure that wasn’t german-german. However, that was still a bit dumb reaching your hand into the *edited*er. First thing I do is look for the faucet. No faucet, no hand washy.
Exactly. Doesn’t matter if it says it’s the urinal or not. Plus I think most people would be more wary about yellow liquid.
NuRayZ said:
torankusu said:
I pointed that out when it was first added in a LONG time ago. You guys sure are attentive, lol.
you should know us guys don’t really listen to you women. We just nod and continue thinking about boobs/sex
What I find funny about that is that some people kept calling me “he” on here up until a few months ago.
If we are going to utilize alltalk, I think we should have the level of access to turn it on and off (so if the server is empty or something and you want to turn it off), BUT if there are people in the server, we have to vote to enable or disable it.
They are constantly buffing and nerfing heroes. And you can still be two lvls higher than the other guys — don’t suck and kill them.
If you don’t know how to last hit on LoL, you fail.
There isn’t any denying of creeps. Unfortunate to some, but I don’t mind either way.
Bitey said:
I’m considering it… I might just go to LoL though.
If you do, I’m torankusu.
I’m not sure about HoN, but LoL sometimes has problems, so there’s sometimes some unscheduled downtime. But I deal with it cuz I’m addicted. :[
MajorMajorMajor said:
Nickname said:
everything is totally nicknames fault, i get it
marriage has made you submissive
NOT GOOD
Everything is going according to plan. Aww, Nickname. D:
Oh god… if I go back to read everything, I just realized that was on page 19. I’M FORTY PAGES BEHIND.
The last time I visited this abomination was Oct. 22, 2009 apparently. When I clicked on the link, it directed me to this post.
That is all.
