Random funny pickup lines

[wispy]

the topic says it all post your pickup lines funny or serious put it down

[Phonetically Phamous (dice]

their are no “pickup” lines,, they just dont work.

 

 

…only openers

[So-CaL A]

i disagree…

 

 

is that a mirror in your pocket??

cuz i see myself in your pants. HA

 

 

that one always works

[Renton’s Big Bro]

honestly this one does have about a 40% chance to keep the convo going – lil bump into her at the bar… then a excuse me, hi i’m bill, umm…. do you know how much a polar bear weighs? – ughhhh nooo (disgusted) – enough to break the ice! so what’s your name?

[Thor]

Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn’t 3.5 inches and it ain’t floppy.

[Ephraim]

“I bet you’re wearing space-pants, because your *edited* is out of this world.”

 

I hereby apologize to every female in the world for the preceading statement.

[rainefardreamer]

Renton said:

honestly this one does have about a 40% chance to keep the convo going – lil bump into her at the bar… then a excuse me, hi i’m bill, umm…. do you know how much a polar bear weighs? – ughhhh nooo (disgusted) – enough to break the ice! so what’s your name?

 

yeah, i use that one too…i like it

[B R I E F S]

My boys over there bet that I wouldn’t be able to start a conversation with the most beautiful girl in the room. Want to buy some drinks with their money?

 

 

 

 

just look for the drunkest chick in the bar wispy

[B R I E F S]

NoDice said:

their are no “pickup” lines,, they just dont work.

 

 

…only openers

werd

[heat!]

“nice tits”

[wispy]

when hitting on a girl i don’t know i always ask what she thinks about something so she gives me her opinion then i go for it.

 

Do you like the flinstones because i can make your bedrock. I like this pickup line lol

[Renton’s Big Bro]

So, how do you like your eggs? Poached, scrambled, or fertilized ?

[wispy]

lol i want to try one of these for one night and see how well they will work or if they would work at all

[B R I E F S]

just go on the dance floor and look for some girls dancing alone, then go dance with them, ive taken 2 girls home without saying anything to them until we got out of the bar L!OL!O!L

[heat!]

its true, im no good with words but dancing with a chick works just fine

[B R I E F S]

true story – my buddy was at the alehouse talking to some girl, he then throw up on her as he was talking to her LOL.

[Ephraim]

In order for mankind to survive, this thread must be destroyed!

[heat!]

true story – was talkin to some chick and she threw up on me as i was talkin to her

[B R I E F S]

LOL, *edited* thats gross

[wispy]

well last week i got with some chick and didnt even get her name and i saw her today awwwwkward i did talk a little bit but briefs is right the dancing works as i danced 1st talked latter

[Pink Monkey #13]

a few. hopefully i can remember them all correctly:

 

Lets play military. I’ll lay down and you can blow the **** out of me.

 

Nice shoes. Wanna f***?

 

If you were a booger, I’d pick you first!

 

I see you’re a female……we should date.

 

You know what would look good on you? Me.

 

If we were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?

 

If I jump on your back, would you beat me off?

 

It’s cold outside. Can I use your thighs as ear muffs?

 

Roses are red, Violets are blue, All my base, Are belong to you.

 

The word of the day is “legs.” Let’s head back to my place and spread the word!

 

and my personal favorite:

 

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you???

 

 

edit: btw, i don’t condone the use of these on any female, ever. To do so would be a terrible idea. And i am posting these merely for entertainment purposes.

[Ephraim]

Sexist thread is sexist.

[B R I E F S]

if i knew a hot nerd, I’d def. use the roses are red one., but hot nerds are far n few between.

[Chris’-‘]

almost all, if not all, of pink monkey’s are from family guy

[heat!]

i never knew a hot nerd

[B R I E F S]

I lost you after nerd crying, wtf?

[Nickname]

Hey I forgot my phone number, can I borrow yours?

[Pink Monkey #13]

i did not know those were from family guy. I actually got most of em off another forum i frequent. Yes, i’m a forum *edited* sometimes…

[heat!]

it may have been not not appropriate but it was true.

[wispy]

lol i used some of these pickup lines when i was in some convorsations with some girls i brought up the topic. Somehow I forgot what i said because i was drunk, but i remeber they thought it was funny and i preceded to get some phone numbers hooray for me!

[Author]

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