This class if far from failure, but I just had to share with you guys some of the things that I have to turn in.
Here is one question (and my answers lol) which is very similar to the majority of material we do in class. This is a 400 level course mind you…
5.)Fantasy Analogy: think of ideas for improving school attendance.
The next time you skip, we take a finger. After 10 absences and 10 fingers, we take your nose.
If you miss school, you won’t be able to participate in the evacuation of earth, because we won’t let you! If you didn’t know, a meteor the size of planet Neptune is headed this way, and will hit the earth harder than Paquiao did Hatton. You will not only feel immense pain, and suffering, but all your favorite cartoons will forever be forgotten. So you better go to class. Kapeesh?
If you keep skipping, the next time you skip, a giant demon from the underworld, will take your feeble little brain, and use it as an eraser. He will keep you alive in the process, and so you will feel every ounce of pain that he dishes. This will feel at first kind of tingly, and before that like an eternity of death, but not to worry, as long as you attend class, you will be okay! 
You don’t want to know what happens if you skip class. Do you remember Bobby? I am sure you do. He is no longer with us, not because he was pulled from school but because he suffered a very sad fate the day he decided to skip. When he did, not only was he expelled from school, but his soul was forever gone. No chance for redemption, so stay in school, cool?